Blunder Woman

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Hey, what do you know? It turns out that I am a superhero! ( I just got the memo.)

My super powers:

*the ability to fill two shopping carts in one shopping trip and push them both out to the car without denting anyone’s fender or losing that slippery pack of toilet paper precariously balanced on the top of the heap

*the uncanny knack of knowing when the kids have been quiet for a little too long

*a super-enhanced sense of smell for detecting about-to-go-bad produce (and the closely related skill of instantly concocting a meal that uses up said produce before it’s too late)

*the power to contain and neutralize any biological fluid known to man without vomiting

*multi-dimensional time-bending ability that allows me to attend a parent-teacher conference, pick up a prescription, turn in library books, meet my husband for lunch, and take a sick child to the doctor’s office within a time frame of roughly forty-five minutes

My Kryptonite:

*whining

My Arch Enemy:

*Surly Customer Service Girl

My Catchphrase:

*Because I said so!

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9 responses »

  1. I so need your superpowers this weekend! I’m a single mom – temporarily – and after 2 days of it, I’ve decided that no matter what, I will never divorce Michael (not that it had every crossed my mind, by the way!) because I don’t think I could hack it single! My 3 kiddos are about to do me in, and don’t even get me started on the my errand-running earlier – a total nightmare!!!

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