Cold Weather Survival Tip #11

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Just a little word of caution:

If you ever move from Georgia to nothern Idaho, there’s a chance that one day you will drop your car keys deep into the snow and have to fish them out with your bare hand because, being a southern girl, you will forget to bring your gloves, despite the fact that there are tiny icicles hanging from the hairs inside of your nose.

When you do, be sure to dry the key off completely before you stick it into your door lock. Otherwise, the melted snow will seep into the lock and refreeze at a later time, leaving you standing, coatless (because you never learn, do you?), in the middle of the mall parking lot twenty minutes after it closes, balancing packages on both hips, bent over awkwardly at the waist, huffing and puffing into the keyhole to melt the ice so that you can get home.

Hypothetically.

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13 responses »

  1. I’m from northern Illinois where we have lock de-icers hanging from our key rings all winter long, not one but TWO pairs of gloves in our pockets and a third pair in the car along with an extra coat (you just never know). It’s not sufficient to have just one ice scraper, you need one that’s good for removing the piles of snow, then one that’s good for actually scraping the ice. Now then, since I moved to PA, I can’t seem to remember to wear a coat. It just never seems quite cold enough here, despite being freezing and all. It just doesn’t compare to the bitter cold in the midwest. Good luck, Stay warm!

  2. Addendum: Keep a small can of lock de-icer in your coat pocket at all times in case you go to the mall with a former Georgia peach. You just never know…

  3. That does NOT sound like a fun time. I think I’ll stay here in Oklahoma where our colest lastely has been 30 degrees & up until last week, we were down to a low of
    50. Ahhh gotta love the south!

    PS Thanksgiving was a high & low of 60/56.

  4. Of course.

    After two years on the windswept northeastern coast of Scotland, where I had to tie my garbage can to a huge iron loop sticking out of the apartment building so it wouldn’t fly away at night, where I went to bed wearing a flannel top and bottom, socks on my hands and feet, a cap on my head and my body curled around a hot water bottle, where icy waves hit my car during bad storms, and where I discovered what long johns really are for … I sympathize with you. 🙂

    God bless the South.
    Warm at last,
    Lisa

  5. I’m bent over huffing and puffing from the walk across the parking lot here in Texas, where the high temp. tomorrow will be 70 something…well, I’m so out of shape leaning the recliner back gets me out of breath, so maybe it isn’t the heat wave…

  6. Yep, today’s temp is somewhere around 70. I’ve been outside decorating for Christmas in my short-sleeved tshirt, fighting mosquitos! Have to say that I can’t imagine digging through snow to find car keys, but that story sounded exactly like something that could hypothetically happen to me 🙂 I’d love to live up north during a winter – just one! I’ve never seen snow that you could actually dig through! The only time it snows here, it either disappears as soon as it hits the ground, or sticks and freezes into lovely sheets of ice. Don’t think that’s happened in a few years though! We did have snow flurries on Cmas Eve last year 🙂

  7. And this is why I pay a fortune to live in California. Sunny. Snow free. (But with Tahoe just a hop skip and a jump away) California.

    (Of course it’s raining today and I forgot my umbrella… and my wool coat isn’t exactly water-proof, but whatever.)

  8. In Kentucky, where I can spit and hit the north or the south, it’s freezing today. I claim the southern part of my Kentucky existance and hope God never calls me anymore North than I am. If God meant for us to wear coats and gloves, He’d have covered us in fur. 🙂

  9. LOL you all are silly. I love living in the frozen tundra, minnesnowta. And Katrina… your story would be that much better if you had one of those cars that refuses to start if the key is wet because in the car manufacturer’s mind that is a sign of sweat from a person who stole the car keys.. its some anti-theft device. go figure. I used to drive my friend to Iowa every other week for some medical appointments and we took her car and I learned of this feature inconveniently after I stopped at a convenience store, used the restroom,washed my hand, fished the keys out of my pocket with damp hands and then was stuck with a car that wouldn’t start for about 1/2 an hour. stupid cars.

  10. Ha! I went briefly insane and moved to Wisconsin from my home state of California. I lived there for three years before I regained my senses, grabbed a husband and moved back to CA.

    I hate the frozen locks thing. I remember the bottom freezing to the car seat. I remember the car not wanting to start because it’s too cold. And, I hated my boss for making me go to work when it was 15 below.

  11. Another tip: only touch metal with gloved hands or absolutely dry hands, although even that is not really safe… Oh, and do not, what ever you do, lick the metal stair railings!

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